My plan was to do this Tuesday or Wednesday or so. Ya know, to start out the week by doing a test speedrun.

But instead, my first world problem is that the library kind of wants their copy of Tomb Raider back (whodathunkit) so now I’m apparently trying to cram as much Tomb Raider into my life as can reasonably fit.

To go off on a tangent, I haven’t decided what I’m going to do about TR. I mean, the cheap bastard in me says that I can just wait until I’m next in line again at the library (up until now, I’ve been blessed to be able to renew it several times).

I frankly can’t remember the last time I actually bought a game for PS3. My most played game would probably be Uncharted 3. Hours and hours and hours of coop. The library owns it; I do not (I did however pay $10 for the online access code). And so far for the PS4, the only games I have are either what came with my PS+ subscription or what I’ve been able to procure from the library.

What I’m considering as an alternative is to start a free trial on a game rental membership to get Tomb Raider and then decide after that (and hey, maybe it will be on sale by then). Alternately, the library copy could be back in my hands by the time the trial is over.

Serious first world problems here.

Stepping off of that tangent, I basically decided that I would go ahead and try to speedrun tonight instead of waiting until next week when my schedule frees up. Especially given that, who knows, maybe I would speedrun it once and hate the process and know that I never ever wanted to speedrun again.

Tomb Raider speedrun results

So, spoiler alert: my time was 3:23:08. That’s 3 hours, 23 minutes, and 8 seconds.

Here’s the uncut run with commentary: http://www.twitch.tv/hayleytormenta/b/553991816?t=7m - if the timestamp doesn’t work, I start the run about 7 minutes in.

Better yet, I’ve just made a highlight: http://www.twitch.tv/hayleytormenta/c/4809306 - this is the run itself.

So, I hereby declare that I have set a world record tonight. I have to qualify it like so. It’s the world record for:

  • Tomb Raider 2013
  • on PS4
  • on easy
  • in the Guerilla suit
  • with the French audio track

Surely, surely, with all of those qualifications, I am the sole world record holder.

On a somewhat serious note, I have zero intention of breaking world records. I’m pretty sure I don’t have the hand-eye coordination to pull it off. And I especially don’t seem to have the twitchy, split-second reaction capabilities necessary to get anywhere near the world record times. I am fascinated by the people who do though.

things I learned

Surely, I’ll have to rewatch it because, at this very moment, my brain is nearly mush.

But what I realize that I’d really like to do is to highlight all of the things that did and did not work out in each run. Maybe I’ll figure that out tomorrow.

things I want going forward

a list of unskippable cutscenes along with their durations

I could be wrong but I feel there are far more unskippable cutscenes on the PS4.

They’re handy though, as they’re your chance to guilt-free grab a drink, take a pee break, or just rest your freaking eyes.

So I need to know where they are and sadly, I need to time my pee breaks. Because SCIENCE. If you wanted to get real science-y about it, I’d ideally be measuring my liquid intake too so that I would be able to say “okay, I’ve consumed this much liquid, my pee break will take approximately X seconds, so hey, this unskippable cutscene is indeed long enough to fulfill the requirements of said elimination of consumed liquids”.

Er, science!

a visible timer

I think this would actually be possible with my current method of streaming direct from the PS4. The thought is that I’d attach an external camera and just point it at a stopwatch.

For good or bad, one thing holding me back from trying this is the presumed increase frequests for me to be on camera. That, and needing a PS4 compatible camera.

a list of skills I’m actually supposed to get… in French

Oops. Should’ve researched this one before starting. I’m hoping that the reason I was getting murdered so often on freaking easy was the fact that I basically spent the whole game without using any upgrades except for Roublardise (“Dirty Tricks” I think) and Recyclage. I’m pretty sure I never upgraded a weapon either.

more savegames

Ah, curses to you Tomb Raider with your 3 save slots. I need to find out how difficult it would be (and if it’s even possible) to back up individual save files so that I could load them at any time. Because, to me, it’s a huge time waster to have to play through a whole bunch of the game just to be able to get to a specific area to practice a trick.

It’s nice to know when I get a friend request during a stream so I can acknowledge the person. If I do end up ultimately streaming from a computer (instead of direct from the PS4) this will matter less since people won’t know my playstation ID. But basically, I’d like to see friend requests and nothing more. Especially given that I’m going to have to figure out how to blur out the messages in my elgato-captured-footage.

Well, my brain is almost entirely gone at this point, so I’ll just wrap this up.

I had fun, I’m sure I’ll speedrun again.

At the least, I know I’ll go glitch hunting again.

You know, perhaps ending the week with a speedrun is better than my original plan of starting with one. Because despite the fun I had, I’m sure I’ll need a few days to sleep this one off.